


Loud

by AnonymousSinner



Category: Jacksepticeye RPF, Markiplier RPF, Septiplier - Fandom, Youtube RPF, jacksepticeye, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Anal Fingering, Blow Jobs, Body Worship, Coaching, Communication, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, Fluffy Ending, Hand Jobs, Insecurity, Kinda, Light Dom/sub, M/M, On Jack's part, Oral Sex, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rough Sex, Shower Sex, Smut, a lil bit, is good, mark just wants to love him, positive reinforcement, sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-15
Updated: 2016-09-15
Packaged: 2018-08-14 01:09:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7993060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonymousSinner/pseuds/AnonymousSinner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Four times Jack was quiet during sex, and one time he wasn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1, 2, 3, 4

**Author's Note:**

> ya ok so this had been on my laptop half-finished for like, a week, and i finally decided to just. get it done. i just had the idea of shy!jack in my mind and i was like "fucking FINE i'll write it" bc if i couldnt concentrate on my other works unless i got the idea out of my head! i hope you like it!! comments are most appreciated!!!
> 
> IMPORTANT EDIT PLEASE READ: I will delete this edit once the problem has been solved, but it someone stole my work and used it for a different pairing. It's a literal copy paste - they just changed the names and fucked with the pacing a bit by adding "he said" here and there. Here's a link to said plagiarised fic: http://archiveofourown.org/works/9471908. It would mean a lot to me if you could report this person for plagiarism using this link: http://archiveofourown.org/tos#IV.E.
> 
> It would really help me out, because I really want that copy taken down. I work super hard on my writings and seeing all those comments and kudos for something that was stolen like, upsets the hell out of me. Thank you so much in advance.
> 
> OTHER IMPORTANT EDIT: thank you guys so much. Said fic has been taken down. You are all awesome.

Jack is quiet during sex. It's unexpected, because anyone who has spoken to him for over two seconds will tell you how decidedly _not_ quiet he is. His videos, his laugh, his excited chattering - every aspect of his personality is constantly turned up to the highest volume, and Mark loves that about him. He loves how confident and outgoing and _loud_ his boy is, he loves his inability to whisper, loves his failed attempts at giving him the silent treatment whenever they have an argument, loves the way his face lights up when Mark says something funny and how his laugh bursts out of him, bright and beautiful and impossible to ignore. He loves all of it, and it's become so familiar to him, so natural and so Jack, that whenever it's missing, it feels wrong.

The first time, Mark hadn't really been in the right state of mind to notice it. At 3 am, curled up together on the couch, soft lips brushing his and dainty fingers reaching up to thread through his hair - he hadn't been able to think. His mind was filled with static, drowning out everything that wasn't Jack. All he could smell was coffee and newly dyed green hair, all he could taste was the chocolate he'd been eating and hints of minty toothpaste, because they'd brushed their teeth a while ago and then completely failed to go to bed. So there they were instead, with Mark pressing Jack into the cushions, his hands roaming impatiently over any exposed skin he could find, and God, he'd felt so wonderful underneath him. He remembers it now, remembers how he'd whispered in Jack's ear, asking, pleading, kissing the soft skin of his cheek when he heard the hushed " _yes, Mark, please._ " He remembers how good he'd tasted, how he leaned his head back against the armrest of the couch to let Mark kiss his way down his throat, how his hips had stuttered when his teeth grazed his collarbone. He remembers how he'd bit his lip when Mark slipped a hand into his sweatpants, remembers how his fingers dug into Mark's back as he hid his face in his shoulder. He remembers how he'd sunk his teeth into the fabric of Mark's shirt, remembers how he shuddered when he released into Mark's hand without making a single sound. He remembers it now, but back then he hadn't realised, had just been in complete awe of blue eyes blown wide and lips bitten red, had just felt how he trembled, how long lashes cast shadows over flushed pink cheeks, how _perfect_ Jack was to him.  
They'd slept in a tangled mess of limbs on a couch that was far too small and woken up with their muscles screaming in complaint, and they hadn't cared even a little.

The second time, he hadn't been paying much attention to it either. He has his reasons, really, because considering what Jack had been doing; there hadn't been much room for noise anyway. And God, he remembers it so well, how his back hit the wall of his bedroom as small but strong hands shoved him back, completely ignoring the camera that was still recording in the background. A vlog that never went up, a vlog that Mark honestly couldn't have cared less about in that moment. Because Jack had kissed him so beautifully, tongue sliding into his mouth with ease as Mark surrendered to him, moaning into his mouth. And he remembers it now, remembers how readily Jack had fallen to his knees, remembers how blue eyes had met his without a single sliver of uncertainty, remembers how he hadn't said a single word as he unbuttoned Mark's jeans and pulled them impatiently down his thighs. Mark remembers how he'd let his head fall back, staring at the ceiling of his bedroom in a desperate search for air as Jack took him into his mouth, and how warm and wet and _wonderful_ it had felt. He remembers how he'd curled his fingers into soft hair, remembers how he'd gasped out Jack's name. He remembers how Jack had slid a hand into his own pants; messy and quick and so fucking hot. He remembers how he'd tugged at those bright green locks, how he'd unwittingly pulled Jack closer as he squeezed his eyes shut, and he remembers the extraordinarily quiet, muffled moan that he almost didn’t hear over his own panting breaths. He remembers it now, how he'd tugged Jack up and kissed him, urgent and sloppy and more teeth than tongue, and how his boy had stayed utterly silent, had just kissed him back, arms wrapping around his neck as he relaxed against him.  
Back then, he hadn't seen the problem, had just been lost in the feel of him; had seen the reddened cheeks as a sign of arousal instead of embarrassment. He's kicking himself for it now, wishes he’d understood sooner. But he couldn’t have known, then. Not enough information to go on.

The third time, he had noticed. The third time, it wasn't 3 am, and there wasn't any genuine reason for Jack to stay quiet. He should have said something, then. But he'd been too preoccupied by how pliant Jack had been, how easy he had made it for Mark to press him up against the wall, how natural it had felt to grab his legs and wrap them around his waist, holding him there as Jack clutched at him desperately, nails digging into his skin. And fuck, he'd been so beautiful, his eyes falling shut as Mark rocked against him, and he remembers the soft gasp that had left him as he'd pressed his lips against Jack's ear, murmuring praise into his skin. Mark remembers staring at his face, remembers watching avidly as Jack sunk his teeth into his bottom lip. He remembers squeezing him harshly through his jeans, remembers Jack's eyes snapping open, remembers his hands yanking Mark’s face close. He remembers how frantically Jack kissed him, lips colliding with his, remembers how he'd muffled his whimper in Mark’s mouth as he came into his jeans. He remembers dishevelled green hair and wild blue eyes that promised him Jack was all fucking his.  
It was only much later, when they were curled up together in front of a movie and a full year’s supply of popcorn and other snacks that all his memories finally came together; forming a thought that Mark found so unsettling he immediately pushed it aside. A mistake on his part, but Jack had been smiling and laughing at the characters on screen, and he hadn’t wanted anything to take his attention away from that. Some things are sacred.

The fourth time, Mark couldn’t have missed it even if he wanted to. His mind had been going over that same uncomfortable thought for days, playing it on a loop, and that morning in the shower finally confirmed it. He remembers it well, that morning, because all of his attention had been entirely focused on Jack. He remembers how he’d smiled softly when Mark had joined him, remembers how he’d leant against him as Mark wrapped his arms around his waist. He remembers pale fingers drawing gentle lines over the backs of his hands, remembers the smell of apples from the suds sliding over wet skin and the slight taste of soap from the kiss Mark had pressed to his shoulder.

_“Someone’s feelin’ clingy this mornin’.”_

_“You can’t expect me to wake up in an empty bed and not want to have you back in my arms as soon as possible.”_

_“I’m not complainin’.”_

_“Didn’t think so.”_

Mark remembers the soft sigh that had escaped soft pink lips as he slid one hand up to play with his nipple, remembers the involuntary shiver he’d elicited by scratching oh so gently at the skin of his inner thigh, trailing teasing fingers higher and higher as he mouthed lazily at Jack’s neck. He remembers how his legs had trembled when he finally took him in hand, remembers watching his eyes flutter shut and his mouth fall open as he stroked him slowly. 

_“Good?”_

_“Hmm.”_

_“You’re gorgeous like this.”_

He remembers having picked up the pace, remembers having been able to see the blood rise in Jack’s cheeks as he steadied himself against the tile wall with one hand, the other gripping tightly at Mark’s arm. He remembers how his heartbeat sped up at the sight, remembers how he’d pressed himself up against Jack’s back, wanting, as always, to be closer. He remembers biting down on the lobe of his ear, remembers how Jack had visibly shuddered in his arms, letting out a shaky breath.

_“You close for me, baby?”_

_“Hmm.”_

_“God, I can’t wait to see you come. You’re always so fucking beautiful when you do.”_

_“Hmm… Hah…”_

_“Losing control there, Jack? Should I spread you open on my fingers, see how you fare then?”_

_“Oh, **fuck**.”_

Mark remembers the loud gasp, remembers how he’d scrambled for purchase against the slippery wall, remembers how one hand had flown up a second too late to cover his mouth. He remembers how Jack had bitten down hard on the skin just above his thumb, silencing himself, remembers how his knees had buckled as he came, remembers how quiet he had been. On purpose. He did it on purpose.

_“Why won’t you let me hear you?”_

_“What?”_

“ _You keep forcing yourself to stay quiet. Why?”_

_“I… I need ta go edit. We’ll talk later.”_

He remembers watching him leave the shower, remembers the awful sinking feeling in his gut. He remembers deciding to let it go, remembers sitting down in his room to work on videos and failing miserably to get anything done. He remembers going downstairs much later on, tentatively approaching Jack and kissing his cheek. He remembers how they didn’t talk about it at all.


	2. Fifth Time's The Charm

They’re kissing again. It’s wonderfully familiar, but at the same time, Mark doesn’t think he’s ever going to get used to it. Every kiss is like the first, yet each time, it’s better than the last. Jack is sighing softly against his lips, not even trying to take control as Mark slips his tongue inside of his mouth, exploring him. He lies there, head tilted back to meet him; content to let himself be kissed inside out and upside down as Mark slides a hand under his shirt, teasing at the hairs just above his bellybutton. Milky white thighs fall open easily to accommodate him, letting him be as close as he wants to be, and it’s so early, around 4 am, but Mark has never felt less tired in his life. He pulls away, giving them both a moment to breathe, and Jack’s eyes slowly flutter open, blue almost completely replaced by black.

“I should be mad at ya for wakin’ me up,” he murmurs, voice cracking adorably, “but that was too nice to complain about.” His hands rest limply either side of his head; pliant and lazy, sleep evidently still clouding his senses as he smiles tiredly up at Mark.

“Good,” Mark replies, the pads of his fingers stroking down his cheek. Jack leans into the touch, and he’s so beautiful like this, soft and warm and malleable. He looks content, happy and _safe_ – Mark can barely believe his luck. Jack’s all his for the taking, wouldn’t deny him anything.

“Jack?”

“Hm?”

“Can I touch you?”

“Ya woke me up for this – I’d be pissed if ya didn’t.” Blue eyes shine with mirth, a crooked smile tugging at soft pink lips, and fuck, Mark is so in love it’s silly. He kisses him again, because he’s there and because he can, and slowly lifts his t-shirt up and over his head. Jack raises his arms automatically, and he giggles softly when the fabric gets caught around his head. A quick tug sets him free, and Mark brushes away the strands of hair that fall into his eyes, wanting to see every inch of his face.

“Hi,” Jack says, grinning, and then he pushes himself up to continue kissing him. Mark lets him for a moment, losing himself in the feel of his lips, and then slowly presses him back down, pinning him gently but firmly into the mattress.

“I wanna do so many things to you,” he murmurs, pressing his lips just above his collarbone, and Jack shivers involuntarily.

“Fine by me,” he whispers, fingers coming up to run through Mark’s hair.

“Wanna kiss you everywhere,” Mark tells him, and starts to do just that. He kisses a trail down Jack’s chest, keeping his eyes locked with his, and smiles when he hears his breathing quicken up. He kisses a spot above his hipbone, draws the skin in between his lips and gently bites down, bruising it. Jack hisses quietly, teeth pulling at his lower lip.

“Wanna spread you open on my fingers,” Mark continues, his voice low and promising, “Wanna make you come.” 

“Please,” Jack says, fingers going up to wrap around the bars of the headboard. It’s a thing he does whenever they’re making out and things get a little too heated, when he wants to stay grounded, to maintain some control over his reactions. Mark loves it when he does that, because it’s usually a last resort sort of thing, and it never works.

“I will babe, I promise,” he says, curling his fingers into the waistband of Jack’s boxers and pulling them slowly down his thighs as he shifts back, lips pressing at a small freckle next to his right knee. Jack exhales softly, hips lifting off the bed to help him. Mark drops the boxers to the floor, and then moves off the bed, grabbing the bottle of lube that they keep hidden underneath it. Jack makes a quiet, displeased sound at the loss of contact, and Mark chuckles softly as he crawls back over him.

“I’m here, baby,” he whispers, lips brushing his, “I’m gonna make you feel so good.”

“God,” Jack breathes, and then he’s lifting his head, moving to kiss him again. Mark pulls back just enough to avoid it; grabs his wrist with one hand to push him down and keep him there as the other slides down between his legs. 

“I want you to do me a favour, Jack,” Mark says quietly, fingers softly grazing the inside of his thigh as he slowly leans closer, so that his nose is almost touching Jack’s. Blue eyes stare up at him in a mixture of confusion and arousal, and his cheeks are tinted an adorable shade of pink.

“Yeah?” Jack’s voice is shaky, and Mark smiles at the sound. He taps once against Jack’s thigh, a wordless command that Jack follows almost immediately, opening his legs wider.

“I’m gonna spread you out on this bed, and I am going to make you come. This is all for you, so you just lie back for me and take it, and I’ll give you everything you need, alright love?” Mark presses the lightest of kisses to Jack’s parted lips, his fingers trailing dangerously close to his cock as he continues, making his voice as low and as convincing as possible. “In exchange, I just want one tiny thing. Could you do one small thing for me, baby?” 

Jack shudders, squeezing his eyes shut as Mark’s voice rushes over him, and he nods.

“What?” he asks, tightening his hold on the headboard as his other hand jerks slightly in Mark’s grip. Mark kisses him, squeezes his wrist softly, and moves his lips next to his ear, brushing the sensitive skin.

“ _Moan for me._ ”

He nibbles softly at the lobe of Jack’s ear, wrapping his fingers around Jack’s cock, and revels in the sharp intake of breath he hears from the man beneath him.

“Good start,” he murmurs, his thumb rubbing over the head of Jack’s cock as he leans back, wanting to see his face properly. His skin is flushed, and he looks beautifully debauched already. 

“Mark,” he starts, sounding unsure, but he’s cut off by Mark’s lips. 

“ _Please_ , baby,” Mark whispers as he pulls back, and buries his nose into Jack’s neck, nuzzling at the spot where it meets his shoulder, “I wanna hear all those noises you’ve been hiding from me. I wanna make you gasp and whine, I wanna make you _scream_.”

“Fucking hell,” Jack curses, head automatically tilting back to give him better access, and Mark takes advantage of the movement to bite into pale white skin, quickening the pace of his hand on Jack’s cock. Jack flinches, shudders beneath him, but stays silent.

He’ll have to try harder, then.

“You taste so good, smell so good, you’re fucking intoxicating,” Mark murmurs, tongue laving over the mark he just made, and he can feel how tense Jack is, how stiff he’s being, focusing all of his attention on staying quiet. 

“I bet you sound so pretty, bet I could make you make the prettiest noises. God, I can’t wait to have my fingers in you,” Mark continues, twisting his hand the way he knows Jack likes. Jack hips buck, and he’s so fucking beautiful it almost hurts to look at him. Mark removes his hand just long enough to coat his fingers generously with lube, leaning down to kiss Jack as he does so, and his lips are wet and red and eager against his. Mark could kiss him for hours on end and still not have enough of him, but he has plans. Reluctantly, he pulls away, moves his lips close to Jack’s ear again as he brushes a finger around Jack’s rim. Jack exhales, his breathing ragged.

“Do you like it when I talk to you like this?” Mark asks, his voice low and quiet, and Jack swallows audibly, staring resolutely at the ceiling.

“Maybe,” he replies, and it comes out throaty and a lot more desperate than he probably intended. Mark laughs softly, and slowly pushes his index finger into Jack’s hole, watching the way his jaw tightens as he grits his teeth.

“I think you do. I think you love it when I tell you how gorgeous you are, when I tell you what I’m going to do to you. Do you like it when I say I’m gonna fuck you with my fingers?” he prompts, and Jack blushes furiously.

“You’re an asshole,” he says, but there’s no bite to his words. Mark just pushes his finger in further, curling it upwards.

“What if I tell you that I’m gonna take it slow? That I’m going to take my sweet time, spreading you open and teasing at that spot inside of you without really giving you what you need? I don’t think you’d be pleased with me then,” he says, punctuating his words with a soft press of his finger just above Jack’s prostate, maddeningly close but not quite touching it. Jack’s mouth falls open, a quiet, barely audible gasp spilling from kiss-swollen lips.

“Yes, more of that please. Don’t hold back, baby. I want to hear you,” Mark tells him, and slips a second finger in next to the first, soft and slow.

“Mark,” Jack murmurs, and those beautiful blue eyes of his are lidded, looking up at him almost pleadingly. Mark hums softly, gently scissoring his fingers and teasing Jack’s nipple with his other hand, pinching and rolling the nub between forefinger and thumb.

“Are you gonna let me hear you, baby boy?” he says, and Jack’s eyes widen almost comically, staring at him in shock as his cheeks turn a striking shade of red. Mark grins.

“You liked that, huh? Like it when I call you my baby.” He pulls his fingers almost all of the way out before pushing them slowly back in, rubbing against the soft, velvety walls inside of him. “My sweet, beautiful baby boy,” he whispers, and Jack gasps again, hips stuttering.

“So gorgeous like this. All mine to play with. Does this feel good, Seán? Do you like my fingers inside of you?”

“ _Jesus_ , Mark,” Jack chokes out, and his cock is hard and leaking against his abdomen, precome leaving a wet trail on his skin.

“I’ll take that as a yes. Good, sweetheart. You’re doing so well for me, so beautiful,” Mark murmurs, teeth grazing the lobe of Jack’s ear as he pumps his fingers in and out of Jack, keeping a slow but steady rhythm. Jack’s breath is coming in quick, short pants, and he’s biting hard on his bottom lip as he rocks his hips in time with Mark’s hand, searching for more.

“So responsive, so eager. I’ll give you what you need, baby. All you have to do is stop holding back,” Mark purrs, curling his fingers, and he’s _so_ close to Jack’s prostate, knows that if he shifted a centimetre to the right he’d be exactly on it, but he doesn’t. Instead he presses firmly at the spot just next to it, watching closely for Jack’s reaction. He trembles, and he’s flushed pink almost all the way down his chest, teeth digging into his lip so hard that Mark’s scared he’s going to start bleeding.

“Let go for me, Jack. All I want is to hear you, to hear how wrecked you feel right now. I just want to hear how you really sound when I fuck you open like this. Jack, baby, _please_.” Mark kisses him then, tongue soothing over the spot he’d been biting at, and Jack lets out the quietest of whines. It’s beautiful, and as a reward, Mark finally pushes his fingers against his prostate.

The response is immediate. Jack jolts beneath him, back arching off the bed as he wrenches his lips away, and he’s gasping for breath, staring up at Mark with wide, desperate eyes.

“Fuck, _shit_ , Mark. Mark, please,” he whispers, needy and pleading, but Mark shakes his head.

“Wanna hear you properly,” he says again, and Jack huffs out a frustrated breath as he shakes his head – Mark isn’t sure if that’s in response to him or to try and convince himself. 

“It’s so _simple_ , Jack. All you have to do is moan for me, without holding back. All you have to do is be honest, and I’ll give you anything you want. I’m all yours Jack, I’ll make you feel so good, but you have to stop hiding from me. Baby, please, let me hear you.”

“Oh, _God_.” Jack actually whimpers then, and it’s quiet but it’s there, and Mark feels like he’s won the fucking lottery.

“Yes, just like that, Jack. Fuck, you’re so amazing, I love you so much.” He scissors his fingers again, stretching him open so that he can add a third, and Jack’s so tight around him but he takes it without complaint. He presses against his prostate, other hand moving down to wrap around his cock, and Jack _moans_. It’s almost piercing, so new and so perfect, spilling easily from reddened lips as if it had been waiting to be set free.

“Okay, okay, _fuck_. Mark, please, stop teasing,” Jack begs, and Mark has never been more entranced by him than in this moment.

“God, Jack, _yes_. You’re perfect,” he says, awestruck, and Jack shifts beneath him, blushing profusely under the praise.

“ _Please_ ,” he says again, and it comes out as a small, desperate whimper.

“Ssh, baby, I’ll give you what you want,” Mark says soothingly, expertly curling his fingers the way he knows Jack needs. He leans forward, sucks a nipple into his mouth and grazes the skin with his teeth as he fucks his boy with his fingers. Little, hiccupping moans begin to leave Jack’s lips, and they start out shy and quiet and unsure, but Mark’s not having it. He scissors his fingers again, pushing back against the tightness he feels around his fingers, and the soft sounds are cut off by a low, thick groan.

“God, fuck,” Jack moans, and he’s moving his hips back in earnest now, trying to meet Mark’s thrusts halfway. Mark pulls off his nipple with a popping noise, slides the fingers of his free hand through neon green hair as he grabs a tuft of it, gently but firmly pulling his head to the side so he can attach his lips to his neck. He tugs at Jack’s hair as he presses his fingers almost harshly into his sweet spot, and Jack’s answering cry is the best thing he’s ever heard in his life. It echoes through Mark’s head, loud and high-pitched and needy, filling up the air the way he knew it would, and it’s so beautiful that Mark cannot for the life of him understand why Jack would ever want to keep it bottled up.

“You’ve been keeping so many wonderful noises from me, baby,” he murmurs, quickening the pace of his fingers, “I love every single fucking one of them, you sound fucking amazing – you’re so _sexy_ , Jack.”

“ _Hah_ , fuck, Mark - ” Jack cuts himself off with another moan, sweet and perfect, his lips forming an o-shape as his back arches from Mark’s ministrations. It’s so fucking gorgeous, but he can’t help but want more, to see just how far he can get him. He wants to unlock every sound Jack can make, doesn’t want to wait any longer to discover them.

“You like it fast, don’t you? Like it when I fuck you hard and fast with my fingers?” He presses roughly against Jack’s prostate, spreading his fingers as wide as they can go, and Jack is whimpering loudly, his legs shaking as he nods.

It’s not enough. Abruptly, Mark stills his fingers, changing to an agonisingly slow pace. 

“What about now?” he says, and Jack fucking _sobs_. It’s a garbled, desperate sound; wrenched free from his throat as he stares up at him with tears of frustration in his eyes, bottom lip quivering as his hands scrabble for purchase against the headboard of the bed.

“ _No_ , Mark, please, come _on_ ,” he begs, and his hair is stuck to his forehead and his lips are swollen and Mark couldn’t have stopped himself from kissing him even if he wanted to. Their tongues tangle together messily, and it’s hard and wet and wonderful. Jack’s moaning openly against his mouth, and Mark swallows every single beautiful sound as he wraps his fingers around Jack’s cock, stroking him fast as he hits his prostate with every thrust of his other hand. Jack whines, hips lifting off the bed and a litany of gasps and _uh_ ’s falling from his lips. He’s too far gone to really notice any of it, and his eyes are squeezed shut as he shudders underneath him.

“You want to come for me, baby boy?” Mark says, and he surprises himself by how deep his voice has gotten. Jack lets out a high-pitched moan in response, nodding his head frantically.

“Please, _fuck_. Mark, please, wanna come. Shit, I wanna come so bad – _please_!” It’s a tone of voice that Mark has never heard before, loud and desperate and utterly wrecked, and it’s so beautiful that it feels like the air has been punched right out of his lungs. 

“Fuck,” he growls, and he can’t tear his eyes away. He fucks his fingers roughly inside of him, keeps a steady pressure on his prostate as he gently presses his thumb against the slit of his cock, and Jack chokes on a moan.

“Please, kiss me, Mark, please,” he begs, and Mark obliges, letting Jack bite harshly at his lips. He’s writhing underneath him, hips bucking wildly as he gasps and whines into Mark’s mouth, and he’s so perfect that part of Mark wonders if he’s dreaming.

“You’re gonna come for me now,” he says, pulling his fingers almost all of the way out, and Jack’s nodding, tears rolling down his cheeks and gorgeous whimpers falling from his lips.

“Yeah, fuck, oh, _shit_ ,” he’s babbling, and Mark twists his wrist, pulling at his cock the same time he pushes his fingers back inside of him, rough and hard and exactly what Jack needs.

He comes with a cry of Mark’s name, arching off the bed so violently that Mark has to let go of his cock to push him back down, and he makes a mess of his stomach and Mark’s shirt, but Mark has never cared less about an article of clothing than he does at that moment. He’s absolutely fucking bewitched, because blue eyes are opened wide and red lips are parted, and Jack throws his head back in a way that can only be described as pornographic. 

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Mark breathes, and Jack clutches at his shoulders, eyes fluttering shut as he slowly starts to come down from his high. Mark is so fucking entranced by him that it takes him a few seconds to realise that he’s shaking.

“Hey, Jack, baby. It’s okay, you did so well, you’re so beautiful.” He pulls Jack close, hugging him to his chest, and he hears a quiet sob in response. Mark kisses his hair, tightening his grip, and gently starts to rock, muttering praises to him as he waits for him to calm down. They sit like that for a while, just holding on to each other, and eventually their heartbeats slow and Jack’s breathing evens out. He hears him take a deep breath, and then he’s pulling away from Mark’s chest, wiping away salty tears with the back of his hand.

“Sorry,” Jack manages, his voice wrecked, and Mark shakes his head, putting his fingers under Jack’s chin and lifting his face up. Jack doesn’t look at him, keeps his eyes downcast, and his face is red with embarrassment.

“Sean,” Mark says worriedly, kissing his forehead, “It’s okay baby, you’re safe.”

“I know,” Jack says, laughing softly, “I’m just. That was kinda intense. Sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologise – baby you’re perfect,” Mark tells him earnestly, and Jack smiles sadly, shaking his head.

“Why?” he asks timidly, and Mark stares at him.

“Because. You’re you, and I love you, and you’re perfect to me.”

“No, but -” Jack stops, shakes his head again. “Never mind.”

“Why did I do all this, you mean?” Mark clarifies, and Jack nods, shyly looking up at him. He looks years younger; small and vulnerable and afraid, and Mark actually feels his heart break.

“Because you were hiding from me, and I didn’t understand why. I still don’t. I just want you to trust me, to feel like you can be honest with me and tell me when something’s bothering you. I wanted to talk about it, but you wouldn’t let me,” he says helplessly, and he’s scared now, because he’s never seen this look on Jack, and he may just have fucked things up spectacularly.

And then Jack smiles, and it’s a smirk, and his eyebrows rise.

“So you decided to fuck my brains out instead?” he asks sarcastically, and Mark sighs in relief, kissing those perfect, perfect lips.

“Had me worried there,” he murmurs, and Jack chuckles softly, bumping their noses together.

“It’s my fault, not yours,” he says quietly, and Mark pulls back, giving him an inquisitive look. 

“My voice,” Jack explains, “I’ve always had issues with it, and like. It’s okay when I’m just talking, but sex is always a bit, um. Especially with you.”

Mark stares at him, and God, he’s so fucking stupid, because it all makes sense. He’s playing it all back in his head now, remembering it all, and of _course_. Jack had actually told him about this specific insecurity years ago, but he’s so confident in everything else he does; Mark had completely forgotten about it.

“Wait,” he says, Jack’s words catching up to him, “Why especially with me? Do I make you feel bad?”

“No,” Jack says quickly, grabbing his hand and squeezing it, “God no, Mark. That’s just it. You’re perfect. You’re so lovely and amazing and there’s the way ya look, like you’re a fuckin’ painted masterpiece or some bullshit, and your voice is so gorgeous, and I just. I don’t compare even a little bit.”

“That’s stupid though,” Mark says fiercely, “because you are the most beautiful person I have ever met.”

“Shuddup,” Jack mutters, and he’s blushing, and it’s so goddamn adorable. Mark wonders how it’s possible for someone to go from overwhelmingly sexy to vulnerable to confident to bashful in the span of like, 3 minutes. He rolls his eyes, kisses him fondly and brushes sweaty hair away from his forehead.

“It’s true, Jack,” he whispers, “You’re the sexiest, most beautiful person in the entire world to me. And just now – Jesus, I almost had a stroke, you were so hot. You have literally nothing to be insecure about, alright?” 

Blue eyes stare at him, big and wide and trusting, and Jack hesitates for a split second. Then he smiles, links his fingers with Mark’s, and nods.

“Okay,” he says softly, and then “I love you.”

“I love you too,” says Mark, “So much.” He pulls him close again, lies them both down and nuzzles into his shoulder, breathing in the scent of him. They stay like that for what feels like hours, just listening to each other breathe, and just when Mark thinks he’s about to fall asleep, Jack speaks up.

“Mark?”

“Hm?”

“If ya don’t get a cloth to clean us up I’m gonna wipe myself off with your hair.”

“The romance never ends,” Mark says flatly, heaving himself out of bed. Jack’s laughter rings behind him as he heads to the bathroom, and it’s joyous and perfect and _loud_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> waaaaaaaaaaaah here we go for the monster that is this headcanon
> 
> the characterisation is a bit off and i probs could have done better but ive had such bad writers block and just wanted this out of the way.... i hope u liked it anyways and if u have any critcisms or anything plz let me know!!! i love all of u <3


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